The Last Week

My last week in London was.... don't know what is that called exactly... dramatical? surprising? well... whatever...

24/10
(Here are what I wrote on the date it happened...) When he just said that to me, I reacted so slowly, it seems not real to me. Indeed hundred of throusands ideas was passing through my mind..... I asked myself... is that because of I have done this or that? did I do something wrong or sth? Or is he just simply too stressful on work...? balbalablalabla? so many things, all suck in my brain.... I was thinking to ask something but I stop myself in another half second. Maybe I would be very annonying or stupid if I ask this or that... I thought um... Finally I only asked "are you sure?" um.... It just came too sudden~ and I really don't know what to react. I didn't know he wanted to say that until the moment he really said it. I was still thinking he would have told about his work until he really said not to be with me... I am such a unsensitive guy lerh~~~ um.... I never know, to dump someon have to start a converstation in this way.

Maybe I am just the one to help him settle in London... maybe that's why I am here, the reason I've bornd. haha.... it sounds quite funny tho... If everything happen with a reason, maybe why I have all I am having is just because the god want to set me in, make him interested on me and I can be function on him.... I have been thinking too much I guess~ It's just another solid prove of "It's almost irrelavent between how good you treat someone or how much you paid and how much you get. Maybe I've already got what I should at the moment of when I spent. Coz I felt truely happy when I did something for him. What I should ask for?? umm... after all... it is just too difficult to find someone you really love and who would love you back the same....

(well... it's fine now... he told me it was a mistake at his lunch time... :D and he want to carry on... the day after -_-)

25/10
I've cought a cold last night partly because I was waiting on the street until he finish work. Partly because I was so stupid, I walked around the Great Portland Street area for almost an hour... :P and couldn't find the way to his office... :P I was very happy though... I explorered the area and decided to take some photos tonight!!! (Esp. thanks for Bernard and Charlie!!!! You guys are stars!! ^_^ Thanks for the Hot Pot dinner!!!)

The photo night was very good :D Some people just came to talk to me coz they also like taking photos. It was a group of youngest came to take photos with me as well haha... so funny... This is why London is so lovely to me...

A summery of what I've done
The rest of the week just passed sooooo quickly... I can't believe it'd just passed.... I went to Camdon with Tina~~ meeting Eiji & his gf. I also went to Jenni's graduration!!! The ceremony was super boring haha.... as usual, but you know this kind of thing... once a life (or twice if you are lucky).

I made a cheese cake for our flatmate and also my friends :D:D. I went to the Korean restaurant for dinner with Richie, Bernard and Charlie~~ haha... It was nice nice :D:D~~ I took some photos with stephane... nothing really special besides that.

Interviews

This week I really work hard on the job hunting... Considered the speed of British, I am doing quite well, haha.... Had 3 interviews and will have another one next Monday.

The Interview today was quite different from the one on Tuesday. The one on Tuesday was very good indeed but I really can't believe that that agency could ask me to do those stupid computer skills test!!!!! -_- Wasted my whole lovely morning! But I also found that although I never use InDesign, but I still can get the test layout done within an hour... haha... I am not bad in learning, huh? haha... However, when I went up the office to see those more sinior agency... the feedback were sooooo positive... I was a bit scared once I step into there indeed... all of the agences came to me to see my portfolio. They are all very nice, although my presentation wasn't that great haha... They keep asking if I am interested in this or that.... inc. Body Shop and Disney!!! wooo (when they asked me if I was interested... I was like.... um.... well... it sounds quite nice haha) ... so funny.... But I think most of them are freelance jobs really.... I just got the call from one of them, she say she wanna send my CV to M&S yea... at least, it means I m not bad ma~~~ although I don't think thats too much chance that I can find something to stay... :(

The one today was only me and one consultancy... And I guess I was not as nervous as last time but I talk through that too quickly (coz she said "let's go through your protfolio quickly" :P) The client she had wasn't suitable for me but she gave me very good recommandation! More "constructive" than the last one and Angela was a very nice indeed... (People in Aquent are nice but they are a bit too "professionally" nice) ah.... btw, I haven't showed her the half finished showreel -_-.... lose the chance to get feedback tim :(

Yea~~

Working on my show reel these few days.... started in a very bad mood... and totally wrong direction... T__T wasted quite a bit time to get on track.... haha... anyway... now is going to the right way lu.... haha... happy happy... hope that I can find something next week... have to prepare this weekend!!!!!!!

Fucking stressful *____*

Recently, I can really feel the stress…. I never have stress feeling that much for very long time probably, since I left college or since i came to London. Like all deadlines in the company were not that dead… Everything was quite easy for me to finish. Um…. before I’ve got the job in Pixi… It has been a bit stress on job hunting but even I couldn’t find a job that time it wasn’t that bad... I could still work on some stupid job like waiter or something... But me, today, even refused the job of £80/day (which is low in London) from Pixi for few days. Or maybe when people grown up a bit… we have a bit more to think of… I wouldn’t say I missed the feeling but I think I should have more stress. Otherwise, when the real panic comes, I may kill myself…. Haha… of cause I won’t…. but maybe, you never know… um…. I do believe stress would push me a lot.

Again, everyone, I really want to go back to HK to work and see you guys… but things just happened like this… and I can’t just leave without trying my best. Um, actually same old problems… leaving, staying, money matter, jobs + the show reel + I really want to start my own animation after the show reel done + the drawings + this time I really have a really dead DEADLINE on these things.. T___T. Or I will lose everything here (Actually I have nothing to lose here except you, u know? But it’s so heavy, so much).

Maybe also, I don’t want to put more stress on you. It seems that if I bring out the things, no one can help well you can’t anyway. When I see you stressful like this, how can I add some more on? um…. Still have 3 weeks…. Can I get it or not?? Not too far to know (not close enough though). (I think you won’t see it until you really finish the project haha…. and you will not be as stress as now ^_^… and you will be able to comfort me a bit…. Such a good calculations! :D)

Thanks for listen to me Tracy… I really felt alone and didn't know who to talk to.... wanted to cry if it wasn’t you to talk to me ^_^. Even you were at work, you still keep me talking…. Yea…. I do need to bullshit a bit last night…. Love you~~ always…~~~

After talked to Tracy, reminded myself it’s not the first time that I live with someone that I can’t be working at night. haha yup… again, I can’t work at night… I hate this feeling… I can’t say anything though; I am not in my own place. (I didn’t say a word last time even i was in my own place indeed) I think I have to be considerate. (Not living in own space is one of the most stressful things in life!) Well… sleeping is basically nothing to me….. So I really can’t imagine how important it is to others… and since I can’t imagine, it is even much scary for me to disturb other people sleep…. Hell…. I don’t want to sleep… it is such a waste of time… um…. I know I know… it probably as worse as I have lost my glasses. I can see (um… feel) how important it is. Um... ok, sleep.... My first pirority is still considering... If I have done something inconsider to you guys... pls forgive me la... sometime people are selfish or careless... haha... I tried my best ga la...

You know when people are in bad mood, all the poor things would come back to your head…It was a fucking bad feeling last time after I talked to Daat daat…. Supposed it was a joke, I guess… But it was just so hurt… Hey come on… I am not such a slut…. I can’t see how good it is to be with someone who you do not entirely love neither… I do love… at least I define it as love although it probably different from yours. And it is important to me… I mean Stef is important to me…. I felt totally no respect in that conversation…. T___T It is so uncool to judge someone’s love life in this way…. -_- especially a good friend like you….

Um… I should celebrate a bit actually. I am really learning things from Stephane!!! And it will be more if I stay for longer I am sure… ^_^... love u~~

Suddenly the music review of “The Eraser”

It's a bit late but I suddenly listen to the album again and again at home, and I really like it!!!! I didn’t really realise my ears were being treated so good for a while… when I listen to those “new” Hknese song from Tina's computer haha… it is such a joke..
Writing the music review is not my job… I am only responsible to the listening part :D haha let see what professionals say~~~

The Eraser - Review 1 - from sputnikmusic.com

The Eraser - Review 2 - from Amazon.com

The Eraser - Review 3 - from theSpacelae.com

yeah... whatever they say... I just love it! :D:D....

Jobless day - 11thOct

Today I have been sucked in the damn showreel thing…. .\ /. What the hell…. Didn’t do much but time just gone… really feel that I am such a useless…. -_- have so much problem to be solved…. How can I finish within this week???? -__- …. I shouldn’t overestimate myself so much -_-… I am just a big shit…

Jobless day - 6thOct

I had been working on the printing for whole day…. really a whole day!!! Until 10 at night haha…. but the outcome was really nice ^_^ finally, it’s been done!!.... I should celebrate a bit lol… And then I had to start the “supposed to be finish by last week” project… the show reel of my animation work… -_-… I should have started my own animation but just worked too slow…. Hope that I really can start my animation sooner…. Otherwise it may not be in this year… T___T….

Jobless day - 5thOct

After the Paris trip, I went to the interview in YCN… it was really shit honestly… I haven’t done the preparation I should have but anyway it was more like a time for me to review my portfolio and asking for advice than an interview ^_^…. Thanks for the advice from Josephine!!! And she took a Polaroid photo for me!!!! The first time I really feel the guy inside the photo (yea that’s me) was quite handsome :P hehe.. lalallalala~~~ maybe Stef say it too much and I started to believe a bit haha…. well.... she said she will put me through in one of the position in Windsor.. which is pretty much the same thing as what I have done indeed….. I am really not sure about that… :( Kinda really want to go back to work… but how can I leave… Everything just work so perfectly with Stef.. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH………….

Moving in Paris

Of cause it's not me moving to Paris haha... I was just to help out the "moving" from Paris to London... Suddenly decided to go to Paris with Stef just 2 days before we actually go.. haha... On the Sat, 30 Sept we took the car and moved everything from Olympia back to Putney and then started our Paris moving trip. It didn't start very well... we parked the car in a permit vehicle only area which cost him £50 T_____T.... And we arrived Paris quite late…
In the 4th days in Paris... basically I haven't done anything... but only worked on my portfolio.... even not started much on the animation one.... :( The most constructive thing I have done was I have watched Six Feet Under.... lol.... It's very good at the first 2-3 episode!!!! I do love it!!!! The rest are quite good but maybe just a bit too much within few days…or maybe a bit all in a similar pattern…. Haha… The last day we went to a restaurant (it looks like a pub more indeed), they do super delicious salad!!!!! A very rich salad!!!! :D:D
yeah yeah yeah... I just remember last time when I left Paris... I said... um... probably I wont be here for a long time la.... -_-.... and I said a very big good bye to Paris... haha... somehow... I came back again within a month.... really, you never know what's gonna happen next :D.... and I finally went to the Palace de Tokyo... and the Modern Art Museum.... I love them ^_^... I have got some inspiration from the animation shown on The Modern Art Museum!!!! so happy!!!!